1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:06,511 [MUSIC] 2 00:00:06,511 --> 00:00:09,111 Well, hello, Del, you ready? 3 00:00:10,210 --> 00:00:11,211 Hey, there. 4 00:00:11,211 --> 00:00:12,199 Sorry about that, 5 00:00:12,199 --> 00:00:16,032 moving from one place to another virtually it's sometimes a challenge. 6 00:00:16,032 --> 00:00:22,450 But hey, listen y'all, it is my pleasure to introduce Del Likins to the stage. 7 00:00:22,450 --> 00:00:29,850 Del has been a student of mindfulness for 21 years and has been teaching for seven. 8 00:00:29,850 --> 00:00:31,748 Growing up in Silicon Valley, 9 00:00:31,748 --> 00:00:36,566 the single mindedness of tech culture led them to pursue a Buddhist college and 10 00:00:36,566 --> 00:00:41,410 numerous years in immersive community-based learning processes. 11 00:00:41,410 --> 00:00:47,264 Highly influenced by the renormalization work of Reverend Angel Kyodo Williams, 12 00:00:47,264 --> 00:00:51,361 Del's approach center models that route us in the body and 13 00:00:51,361 --> 00:00:55,054 locate us between our ancestors and future beings. 14 00:00:55,054 --> 00:01:00,089 Their professional life engaged in meditation instruction, 15 00:01:00,089 --> 00:01:02,277 documentary filmmaking. 16 00:01:02,277 --> 00:01:07,608 Anti-burnout training and activists trends and mental health advocacy and 17 00:01:07,608 --> 00:01:13,445 international research on epigenetics and intergenerational trauma. 18 00:01:13,445 --> 00:01:17,494 Del is currently earning a couples and family counseling degree from Lewis and 19 00:01:17,494 --> 00:01:20,045 Clark College, I know where that is. 20 00:01:20,045 --> 00:01:21,859 Please welcome, Del. 21 00:01:23,110 --> 00:01:24,070 >> All right, here we go. 22 00:01:25,970 --> 00:01:27,310 So, a little bit about me. 23 00:01:28,510 --> 00:01:30,662 Hopefully you know why you've come to this session and 24 00:01:30,662 --> 00:01:33,060 I'm gonna get into hearing who's in the room here shortly. 25 00:01:33,060 --> 00:01:35,711 But first, let me just tell you a little bit about who I am, 26 00:01:35,711 --> 00:01:38,370 where I'm coming from and my entry points to this work. 27 00:01:38,370 --> 00:01:41,580 So again, my name is Del Likins, my pronouns are they/them/theirs. 28 00:01:41,580 --> 00:01:45,867 And I did grow up in the Silicon Valley in the 90s, which is unceded Ohlone land for 29 00:01:45,867 --> 00:01:48,082 those of you who follow indigenous names. 30 00:01:48,082 --> 00:01:51,570 It's important that we recognize that tribal lands that we are on today. 31 00:01:52,870 --> 00:01:58,160 Multnomah, Clackamas, Piute, oops, pardon me, that's in Colorado. 32 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:02,940 So, why did I get into tech or what was it like growing up in Silicon Valley? 33 00:02:02,940 --> 00:02:07,633 It seems pretty obvious for me who was a queer kid really more interested in 34 00:02:07,633 --> 00:02:11,180 theater than in coding like my father did. 35 00:02:11,180 --> 00:02:14,248 I noticed that I didn't have a language for it at the time, but 36 00:02:14,248 --> 00:02:17,441 tech didn't seem as equitable or embodied as I was looking for. 37 00:02:17,441 --> 00:02:20,461 I wanted peer-to-peer relationships, I wanted play, 38 00:02:20,461 --> 00:02:23,240 I wanted to be living in my human form. 39 00:02:23,240 --> 00:02:24,353 But as often happens, 40 00:02:24,353 --> 00:02:27,868 folks find their way into tech through a lot of different entry points, 41 00:02:27,868 --> 00:02:32,760 and I wound up going through a boot camp in, what year was that, 2017, 2018. 42 00:02:32,760 --> 00:02:35,690 And I had my first tech job a few years prior in 2015. 43 00:02:35,690 --> 00:02:39,552 Along the way, finding my way through the world that we live in, I did earn 44 00:02:39,552 --> 00:02:43,793 a bachelor's of contemplative psychology from Naropa University in Boulder, 45 00:02:43,793 --> 00:02:47,938 Colorado and I am working on my master's degree in family therapy currently. 46 00:02:47,938 --> 00:02:51,906 As I mentioned in my intro, I've been a practicing for about 20 years, 47 00:02:51,906 --> 00:02:54,390 I had my first exposure at age nine. 48 00:02:54,390 --> 00:02:57,550 I've been a formal scholar for ten years and facilitating for about seven. 49 00:02:57,550 --> 00:03:03,109 And along those, what can sound like diverging paths have been built in and 50 00:03:03,109 --> 00:03:06,112 prioritized community organization, 51 00:03:06,112 --> 00:03:11,424 can be activism around LGBTQ+ issues also ecological conservation. 52 00:03:11,424 --> 00:03:15,724 And specifically anti-racism and as this presentation sort of anchors confronting 53 00:03:15,724 --> 00:03:20,370 whiteness and white supremacy has become a really central part of the work that I do. 54 00:03:20,370 --> 00:03:22,710 And we're gonna explore today why that is. 55 00:03:25,210 --> 00:03:27,873 I work through a consultancy, this is my my brand begin with.in, 56 00:03:27,873 --> 00:03:30,830 that's the website, you can check it out later if you like. 57 00:03:30,830 --> 00:03:33,473 But, this is here we are. 58 00:03:33,473 --> 00:03:35,350 All right, so who's here? 59 00:03:35,350 --> 00:03:38,323 I can imagine that this topic is this presentation today is brought together 60 00:03:38,323 --> 00:03:41,029 folks with all different kinds of backgrounds, the intersection. 61 00:03:41,029 --> 00:03:43,430 So using the poll feature, I wanna hear a little bit about, 62 00:03:43,430 --> 00:03:45,267 this is the first question we're gonna use. 63 00:03:45,267 --> 00:03:47,954 Hopefully you'll see the poll feature popping up here. 64 00:03:47,954 --> 00:03:50,945 And if you go into that tab, how familiar are you with mindfulness? 65 00:03:50,945 --> 00:03:53,605 Are you in every days as an expert? 66 00:03:53,605 --> 00:03:56,360 [LAUGH] Is this a buzzword that you've heard of? 67 00:03:56,360 --> 00:04:00,631 Let me hear a little bit about what your experiences so far. 68 00:04:05,109 --> 00:04:07,908 Okay, looking for the poll. 69 00:04:13,356 --> 00:04:15,117 Folks getting access to the poll? 70 00:04:27,412 --> 00:04:30,779 Okay, I'm not seeing the poll rising. 71 00:04:40,671 --> 00:04:46,714 All right, Well, let's give it another minute. 72 00:05:08,218 --> 00:05:11,030 Okay, we might have missed out on the poll. 73 00:05:11,030 --> 00:05:14,950 That said, let's go ahead and press on. 74 00:05:14,950 --> 00:05:17,623 Likely there is a span of experience here. 75 00:05:17,623 --> 00:05:21,166 Folks, again, may have had little encounter with meditation and 76 00:05:21,166 --> 00:05:24,790 mindfulness so far, you maybe coming with a lot of information. 77 00:05:24,790 --> 00:05:28,552 I've created this presentation today to cover a broad span of experience, so 78 00:05:28,552 --> 00:05:31,520 hopefully everyone has a little something to get out of this. 79 00:05:32,540 --> 00:05:36,520 The second important question that I really wanna hear from, just kidding. 80 00:05:36,520 --> 00:05:37,560 Let's start. 81 00:05:37,560 --> 00:05:40,750 Let's do a little bit of practice to drop in and see what this is like. 82 00:05:40,750 --> 00:05:45,443 [COUGH] So I'm gonna offer just a very brief invitation to those of you who 83 00:05:45,443 --> 00:05:49,620 don't have a mindfulness practice or meditation practice. 84 00:05:49,620 --> 00:05:51,658 If you have one that you'd like to do, be my guest. 85 00:05:51,658 --> 00:05:53,985 This is all everything I offer here is an invitation, 86 00:05:53,985 --> 00:05:55,600 you are welcome to say no at any time. 87 00:05:56,870 --> 00:06:01,669 So the instructions that I was given for Shamatha meditation is to come to 88 00:06:01,669 --> 00:06:06,246 an upright posture, allowing your spine to be upright but relaxed. 89 00:06:06,246 --> 00:06:09,489 One of my favorite pieces of meditation instruction is that we, 90 00:06:09,489 --> 00:06:12,262 through this process, aim to be both soft and strong. 91 00:06:12,262 --> 00:06:14,901 So you can think about the strength of your back upright. 92 00:06:14,901 --> 00:06:18,737 Or if you're laying down flat, perhaps the strength of the earth beneath you, 93 00:06:18,737 --> 00:06:19,607 supporting you. 94 00:06:19,607 --> 00:06:22,793 And, the softness of your belly cuz human form you have. 95 00:06:22,793 --> 00:06:28,271 So allowing those elements of strength and softness to come together. 96 00:06:28,271 --> 00:06:32,371 For those sitting, the invitation is to have your shoulders come all the way back 97 00:06:32,371 --> 00:06:36,004 off your spine, so allowing those shoulders and your chest to open up. 98 00:06:36,004 --> 00:06:38,595 You don't know where your hands go feeling a little strange about them, 99 00:06:38,595 --> 00:06:39,443 you can just go ahead and 100 00:06:39,443 --> 00:06:42,290 bend your elbows gingerly place them wherever feel comfortable in your lap. 101 00:06:42,290 --> 00:06:44,220 There's no right or wrong way to do this. 102 00:06:44,220 --> 00:06:47,244 And to alert, pardon me, elongate the cervical spine, 103 00:06:47,244 --> 00:06:51,226 tuck your chin just about slightly to in your gaze about 45 degrees down. 104 00:06:51,226 --> 00:06:55,497 And you can either close your eyes or let them have we're about halfway close and 105 00:06:55,497 --> 00:06:56,206 just relax. 106 00:06:59,430 --> 00:07:02,689 [SOUND] So, 107 00:07:06,768 --> 00:07:09,252 I mentioned there's been a lot going on today here in the festival, 108 00:07:09,252 --> 00:07:10,930 a lot that you've encountered. 109 00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:14,102 This is their first moment within this session to just sort of drop into 110 00:07:14,102 --> 00:07:14,653 your body. 111 00:07:16,963 --> 00:07:18,792 Come into contact with your breathing. 112 00:07:25,357 --> 00:07:29,640 Not aiming to change or shift or reach any kind of goal with this shift. 113 00:07:29,640 --> 00:07:34,156 It's just noticing what is noticing what's occurring. 114 00:07:48,264 --> 00:07:51,022 Sometimes, folks, get the idea that in mindfulness, 115 00:07:51,022 --> 00:07:55,190 we're supposed to empty our minds, we're supposed to be blank canvases. 116 00:07:55,190 --> 00:07:58,480 That is not the instruction that I have received, or how I like to facilitate. 117 00:07:59,810 --> 00:08:00,823 One invitation, 118 00:08:00,823 --> 00:08:05,084 if you notice that your mind is full of thoughts which minds are prone to do. 119 00:08:05,084 --> 00:08:08,822 You can think about them as conceptualize or 120 00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:12,767 feeling to them being like clouds passing by. 121 00:08:12,767 --> 00:08:16,320 Our goal is not, again, to empty but just to notice. 122 00:08:17,748 --> 00:08:19,270 There's a thought. 123 00:08:19,270 --> 00:08:22,510 And when we do notice, we come back gently, gently, 124 00:08:22,510 --> 00:08:26,905 gently coming back to the practice, checking back in with our posture, 125 00:08:26,905 --> 00:08:30,094 noticing points of contact on our chair or cushion. 126 00:08:33,595 --> 00:08:35,623 Coming back to breathing their skin. 127 00:08:38,307 --> 00:08:42,330 What is it like to try and be with this one sensation? 128 00:08:42,330 --> 00:08:44,963 One thing at a time, one breath at a time. 129 00:08:46,869 --> 00:08:50,151 Training our minds to focus on one experience, and 130 00:08:50,151 --> 00:08:54,710 be really fully present here with the sensation of breathing. 131 00:08:54,710 --> 00:08:56,321 That's all we got to do. 132 00:09:06,224 --> 00:09:07,447 Okay, on the next outbreath, 133 00:09:07,447 --> 00:09:10,426 I invite you to seal your practice in whatever way feels meaningful to you. 134 00:09:10,426 --> 00:09:12,568 I promise we're gonna come back to more of this but 135 00:09:12,568 --> 00:09:15,175 we have a lot of content to go over today, so let's press on. 136 00:09:15,175 --> 00:09:17,710 And remember that anytime during this presentation, 137 00:09:17,710 --> 00:09:20,475 you can always touch back in to the sensation of breathing. 138 00:09:20,475 --> 00:09:24,325 You always have the resource of this practice here with you. 139 00:09:24,325 --> 00:09:24,995 Let's keep going. 140 00:09:27,089 --> 00:09:29,885 Yeah, all right, I hope the chat box is working for us. 141 00:09:32,193 --> 00:09:33,517 What did you notice is my favorite 142 00:09:33,517 --> 00:09:35,320 question to ask when I facilitate sessions? 143 00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:36,130 What did you notice? 144 00:09:38,070 --> 00:09:41,147 Okay, we've got some good familiarity here, excellent. 145 00:09:48,160 --> 00:09:49,330 Here we go. 146 00:09:51,350 --> 00:09:52,610 Thank you, thank you, everyone. 147 00:09:58,452 --> 00:10:06,300 All right So, 148 00:10:06,300 --> 00:10:09,186 back here in the session chat, we are asking, 149 00:10:09,186 --> 00:10:12,591 what did you notice in the session, in this practice? 150 00:10:12,591 --> 00:10:18,350 Any feedback, anything surprising, anything feeling itchy? 151 00:10:18,350 --> 00:10:20,492 Let me hear at least a couple folks. 152 00:10:20,492 --> 00:10:22,648 Mm-hm, tension in the shoulders. 153 00:10:29,732 --> 00:10:33,979 The hum of the electronics, yeah, got that going on too. 154 00:10:33,979 --> 00:10:36,733 Yeah, sounds like things that maybe were familiar, 155 00:10:36,733 --> 00:10:40,780 maybe some things that we hadn't noticed before dropping into the practice. 156 00:10:42,820 --> 00:10:47,037 Well, let me see here. 157 00:10:47,037 --> 00:10:49,970 All right, we're gonna move on to our second poll. 158 00:10:49,970 --> 00:10:51,330 Thank you for sharing. 159 00:10:51,330 --> 00:10:54,070 Audience participation is an important part of this presentation, so thank you. 160 00:10:55,560 --> 00:10:58,100 Let's talk about how we relate to anti-racism. 161 00:10:58,100 --> 00:11:00,660 There should be a poll here in the session. 162 00:11:02,720 --> 00:11:08,140 Let's hear about what our relationship is with anti-racism. 163 00:11:08,140 --> 00:11:11,540 Which of these numbers best matches your experience so far? 164 00:11:17,032 --> 00:11:18,741 All right. 165 00:11:22,610 --> 00:11:28,237 Cool, got a number of anti-racists in the room, that's great, terrific. 166 00:11:31,388 --> 00:11:33,527 All right, let's keep going. 167 00:11:35,350 --> 00:11:38,815 Perhaps you've heard of passive white liberalism. 168 00:11:40,311 --> 00:11:43,455 For those of you who identified actively as an anti-racist, 169 00:11:43,455 --> 00:11:47,882 you probably are familiar with this idea that intentions don't often equal impacts. 170 00:11:47,882 --> 00:11:51,072 And that white liberals are often very well intentioned, but 171 00:11:51,072 --> 00:11:56,060 reinforce tenets of white supremacy culture out of ignorance of their impact. 172 00:11:56,060 --> 00:12:00,180 Some of these most common tropes and some of the most violent ones are that I don't 173 00:12:00,180 --> 00:12:03,948 see color, or that there is no problem, or that I'm a non-racist. 174 00:12:03,948 --> 00:12:08,076 Pardon me, [SOUND] to avoid this cat hollering off, 175 00:12:08,076 --> 00:12:10,962 I'm just opening the door for her. 176 00:12:10,962 --> 00:12:13,150 COVID life, all right, here we go. 177 00:12:13,150 --> 00:12:15,570 Let's talk about committing to anti-racism. 178 00:12:15,570 --> 00:12:20,081 The reason that I'm a non-racist or that I don't see color are incredibly 179 00:12:20,081 --> 00:12:24,805 problematic is because we have to acknowledge that we eat, sleep, breathe, 180 00:12:24,805 --> 00:12:27,810 and live in a white supremacist culture. 181 00:12:27,810 --> 00:12:33,870 We've all learned its values, we are all navigating them every day of our lives. 182 00:12:33,870 --> 00:12:35,590 We participate in their structures. 183 00:12:35,590 --> 00:12:38,530 It's essentially impossible to leave it behind. 184 00:12:38,530 --> 00:12:39,748 None of us are exempt. 185 00:12:39,748 --> 00:12:46,116 And for the ways in which white supremacy likes to say, I'm a good white person, 186 00:12:46,116 --> 00:12:51,703 I've done enough, that is an attempt to omit ourselves from the problem. 187 00:12:51,703 --> 00:12:54,730 And it's essential that we see ourselves as part of it. 188 00:12:54,730 --> 00:12:56,721 We are intrinsically part of this. 189 00:12:56,721 --> 00:13:01,166 So, anti-racism, again, acknowledges this bias is intrinsic in our society, 190 00:13:01,166 --> 00:13:04,160 something that we don't get to remove ourselves from. 191 00:13:04,160 --> 00:13:05,246 We don't get to other that. 192 00:13:05,246 --> 00:13:06,492 We are part of this. 193 00:13:06,492 --> 00:13:11,350 So in cultivating anti-racism, it does require that ongoing, sustained effort. 194 00:13:11,350 --> 00:13:14,043 And almost as importantly or equally importantly, 195 00:13:14,043 --> 00:13:17,570 is this idea that anti-racism is relationship driven. 196 00:13:17,570 --> 00:13:20,430 That means it's part of a human contact. 197 00:13:20,430 --> 00:13:23,000 There is no arrival or outcome. 198 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:27,870 There is no quantitative measure of you have done this or you embody this. 199 00:13:27,870 --> 00:13:29,849 It's all about who we're in relationship, 200 00:13:29,849 --> 00:13:33,194 the values that we're in relationship with, and how we move towards them. 201 00:13:35,632 --> 00:13:38,995 So as we're talking about this, I wanna invite you again to check back in with 202 00:13:38,995 --> 00:13:41,077 your body, noticing what might be occurring. 203 00:13:41,077 --> 00:13:47,217 If there's new tension arising, maybe some space, if your mind is swirling. 204 00:13:47,217 --> 00:13:50,893 One of the most important things in my practice here is to pay attention to 205 00:13:50,893 --> 00:13:52,956 the body as we engage with these topics. 206 00:13:52,956 --> 00:13:58,470 And to build relationship and resilience by staying connected and not distancing. 207 00:13:59,700 --> 00:14:02,208 So whatever it is that you're feeling. 208 00:14:02,208 --> 00:14:06,352 Again, if there's some discomfort, this is all material for 209 00:14:06,352 --> 00:14:08,394 us to work with and get to know. 210 00:14:10,482 --> 00:14:14,291 Welcome, welcome, welcome to your discomfort, welcome to your space, 211 00:14:14,291 --> 00:14:17,021 welcome to your possibility, welcome to your fear. 212 00:14:17,021 --> 00:14:18,912 All of it is welcome in this moment. 213 00:14:22,220 --> 00:14:25,941 One of the most important ideas within this work is. 214 00:14:25,941 --> 00:14:29,839 Or I should say, one of the areas where folks often get hooked, and 215 00:14:29,839 --> 00:14:33,529 that defensiveness can come up in these early conversations, 216 00:14:33,529 --> 00:14:37,934 is when folks are misinformed about the distinction of these three ideas. 217 00:14:37,934 --> 00:14:41,770 White supremacy, white bodies, and whiteness. 218 00:14:41,770 --> 00:14:44,822 In my work in family therapy field, I study whiteness. 219 00:14:44,822 --> 00:14:49,020 And the ways in which the culture, the values, behaviors, cultures of white 220 00:14:49,020 --> 00:14:52,910 supremacy get communicated and reinforced between people. 221 00:14:52,910 --> 00:14:58,104 So to those who have heard the ideas that I'm not to blame, 222 00:14:58,104 --> 00:15:02,670 or I can't be held accountable, or what have you. 223 00:15:04,330 --> 00:15:07,566 My avenue into anti-racism work is working with whiteness. 224 00:15:07,566 --> 00:15:10,077 Because this is something that we can change. 225 00:15:10,077 --> 00:15:14,788 None of us can change or even necessarily be blamed for the amount of melanin in our 226 00:15:14,788 --> 00:15:18,479 skin tone, for being ancestral people of settler colonists. 227 00:15:18,479 --> 00:15:20,136 But we can be responsible for 228 00:15:20,136 --> 00:15:24,080 how white supremacy is reinforced by the whiteness that we embody. 229 00:15:27,060 --> 00:15:32,140 For those of you who have are unfamiliar with Tema Okun's dismantling racism. 230 00:15:32,140 --> 00:15:35,563 This is one of the most important resources I've ever encountered in my 231 00:15:35,563 --> 00:15:37,020 journey with anti-racism. 232 00:15:37,020 --> 00:15:40,950 And Okun outlines a few key features of white supremacist culture. 233 00:15:40,950 --> 00:15:45,521 Now, this is the idea of not folks in hoods parading through Southern towns, but 234 00:15:45,521 --> 00:15:49,557 these are the tenants, these are the values of white supremacy culture 235 00:15:49,557 --> 00:15:53,050 that get communicated day in and day out in our society. 236 00:15:53,050 --> 00:15:57,326 Perfectionism, urgency, defensiveness, individualism, 237 00:15:57,326 --> 00:15:59,548 objectivity, power hoarding. 238 00:15:59,548 --> 00:16:04,465 And we don't have to look very far to see that these values are, my gosh, 239 00:16:04,465 --> 00:16:07,212 entrenched in tech culture especially. 240 00:16:07,212 --> 00:16:10,262 I mean, they're entrenched in our industry, in capitalism, 241 00:16:10,262 --> 00:16:12,132 they're absolutely part and parcel. 242 00:16:12,132 --> 00:16:16,045 So when you see these characteristics coming up in yourselves or 243 00:16:16,045 --> 00:16:20,757 in your colleagues or in your cambam boards, in your your planning visions, 244 00:16:20,757 --> 00:16:25,401 consider that these are the values of white supremacy culture playing out. 245 00:16:25,401 --> 00:16:30,874 And that these are the values that your colleagues of color especially 246 00:16:30,874 --> 00:16:38,241 are confronting every day So, where does mindfulness fit into this? 247 00:16:38,241 --> 00:16:42,047 We mentioned earlier that intention doesn't equal impact, 248 00:16:42,047 --> 00:16:44,394 and it's important to remain there. 249 00:16:44,394 --> 00:16:48,454 And I doubt that you would be here if you weren't interested in cultivating 250 00:16:48,454 --> 00:16:53,920 anti-racism and seeing how this practice can continue to grow into your work life. 251 00:16:53,920 --> 00:16:58,853 So again, by acknowledging that we are here in this inherently biased system that 252 00:16:58,853 --> 00:17:01,998 allows us to distinguish our roles as disruptors and 253 00:17:01,998 --> 00:17:05,250 to become anti-racists within this system. 254 00:17:05,250 --> 00:17:08,472 We have a lot of learning to do and a lot of that learning, 255 00:17:08,472 --> 00:17:11,559 based on my Background and educational experience, 256 00:17:11,559 --> 00:17:16,240 it comes down to starting with ourselves, that starts with the nervous system. 257 00:17:17,820 --> 00:17:22,957 So even if in pie-in-the-sky situation, your company instituted anti-racist 258 00:17:22,957 --> 00:17:27,529 policies today, it would take a long time to build anti-racist culture. 259 00:17:27,529 --> 00:17:30,212 Because policies does not equal values. 260 00:17:30,212 --> 00:17:34,148 Anti-racism takes people doing inner work on themselves. 261 00:17:34,148 --> 00:17:37,048 It takes white people doing inner work on themselves, 262 00:17:37,048 --> 00:17:40,593 that is reflected in those mutual and consensual relationships. 263 00:17:40,593 --> 00:17:45,417 I imagine a lot of us here have either been or been in connection with colleagues 264 00:17:45,417 --> 00:17:49,584 of color that were tokenized, have been exploited, race baited, 265 00:17:49,584 --> 00:17:53,262 queer baited, into spaces that asked them to do more work. 266 00:17:53,262 --> 00:17:59,118 This is all about how we as often the majority, white, cisgender, 267 00:17:59,118 --> 00:18:05,509 heterosexual people who make up so much of the tech industry especially. 268 00:18:05,509 --> 00:18:08,889 Coming from affluent backgrounds, very often a lot of educational access, 269 00:18:08,889 --> 00:18:09,678 class mobility. 270 00:18:09,678 --> 00:18:16,110 Neurotypical, currently able-bodied. 271 00:18:17,850 --> 00:18:22,390 We need to slow our roll and recognize that this work does start with us. 272 00:18:22,390 --> 00:18:26,500 Our work within the network of anti-racism begins with us. 273 00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:29,200 Let's keep going. 274 00:18:30,658 --> 00:18:34,553 What a perfect opportunity for some breathing, yes, it is. 275 00:18:34,553 --> 00:18:36,342 So this is again an invitation. 276 00:18:38,379 --> 00:18:44,213 This GIF is a model for a deep breath that you are invited to take here. 277 00:18:47,962 --> 00:18:55,056 You can either track with it, Modeling that full expansion of the diaphragm. 278 00:18:56,138 --> 00:18:59,750 Or breathe on your own pace, just taking a moment to digest and 279 00:18:59,750 --> 00:19:01,977 notice whatever is occurring for us. 280 00:19:03,805 --> 00:19:06,435 We'll linger here for just a moment longer. 281 00:19:09,329 --> 00:19:12,467 There is so much content in the intersection of anti-racism and 282 00:19:12,467 --> 00:19:15,432 mindfulness that it makes sense that there's activation, 283 00:19:15,432 --> 00:19:17,070 that there's tension arising. 284 00:19:17,070 --> 00:19:19,240 I wonder if y'all are feeling it too. 285 00:19:21,685 --> 00:19:23,280 Last one. 286 00:19:29,573 --> 00:19:34,148 All right, so nervous system regulation is, 287 00:19:34,148 --> 00:19:38,950 I'm such a nerd for the nervous system. 288 00:19:38,950 --> 00:19:43,080 A lot of you have probably heard of fight and flight, maybe even fight, flight, 289 00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:44,370 and freeze. 290 00:19:44,370 --> 00:19:49,219 More recently, there's come into the collective vernacular, fight, flight, 291 00:19:49,219 --> 00:19:53,460 freeze, and fawn are all potential responses from the nervous system. 292 00:19:54,550 --> 00:19:58,390 These are all also part of the sympathetic nervous system. 293 00:19:58,390 --> 00:20:03,900 So when we get activated, This flight, freeze phone response. 294 00:20:03,900 --> 00:20:05,464 It can hijack the nervous system. 295 00:20:05,464 --> 00:20:10,632 It is this a Magdala, reptilian response, which is like, I'm on, I go. 296 00:20:10,632 --> 00:20:14,192 It's not a conscious choice, but that doesn't mean we're not responsible for it. 297 00:20:14,192 --> 00:20:17,777 So when we perceive danger, the sympathetic nervous system 298 00:20:17,777 --> 00:20:22,498 with all of these F responses, it does get triggered, it does get heightened. 299 00:20:22,498 --> 00:20:25,950 And that's when we perceive danger, real or imagined. 300 00:20:25,950 --> 00:20:29,877 Now, racism as a nervous system response, it's been embedded into our learned 301 00:20:29,877 --> 00:20:32,360 perceptions in this white supremacy culture. 302 00:20:32,360 --> 00:20:37,344 The tropes about Karen's in the park calling the police on black burgers in 303 00:20:37,344 --> 00:20:38,380 Central Park. 304 00:20:38,380 --> 00:20:39,850 That was a couple years ago. 305 00:20:39,850 --> 00:20:42,768 Or maybe you have the experience of clutching your purse a little bit closer 306 00:20:42,768 --> 00:20:44,590 when you see a black man on the street. 307 00:20:44,590 --> 00:20:47,932 That is the nervous system learned response of a white supremacy culture 308 00:20:47,932 --> 00:20:49,620 being enacted in the moment. 309 00:20:49,620 --> 00:20:52,190 It's not always a conscious choice. 310 00:20:52,190 --> 00:20:55,945 But these patterns that we have learned, perpetuated by media and 311 00:20:55,945 --> 00:21:00,706 stereotypes and the incredibly racist policies that take black men, especially, 312 00:21:00,706 --> 00:21:02,130 into the prison system. 313 00:21:03,480 --> 00:21:06,081 There's all of this information feeding into our nervous system, and 314 00:21:06,081 --> 00:21:07,270 our nervous system response. 315 00:21:07,270 --> 00:21:08,930 So, this is where we start to get a choice. 316 00:21:08,930 --> 00:21:10,810 This is actually an entry point for choice for us. 317 00:21:12,570 --> 00:21:14,560 Parasympathetic nervous system, on the other hand, 318 00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:16,302 are basically the two ways that we can respond. 319 00:21:16,302 --> 00:21:18,084 So, the easiest way to remember this, 320 00:21:18,084 --> 00:21:20,630 parasympathetic is when we're in the rest and digest. 321 00:21:20,630 --> 00:21:25,173 We've had a good meal or a little clan of migrant caveman, or 322 00:21:25,173 --> 00:21:29,182 just chilling by some rocks, the sun's going down, 323 00:21:29,182 --> 00:21:33,560 we got a chance, ate some good grass or elk or whatever. 324 00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:36,550 And we are in the rest of digest, we are safe. 325 00:21:36,550 --> 00:21:40,956 We are able to take a chill moment, survey our surroundings, 326 00:21:40,956 --> 00:21:46,570 process our food and metabolize what we've taken in, get some rest, right? 327 00:21:48,300 --> 00:21:53,917 This is what white people, myself included, have a long journey to go on 328 00:21:53,917 --> 00:22:00,380 as how we integrate this process into the cultivation of our anti racism journeys. 329 00:22:00,380 --> 00:22:05,306 So, to be clear, rest and digest doesn't mean checkout or disengage, 330 00:22:05,306 --> 00:22:09,934 it is a conscious regulatory response of, this is part of the work. 331 00:22:09,934 --> 00:22:14,751 I intentionally am choosing that this is part of the work. 332 00:22:14,751 --> 00:22:19,755 Within that landscape, one of the charges that I hope that you hear in this 333 00:22:19,755 --> 00:22:25,260 presentation today, is that it is your job as the white folks who are in the room. 334 00:22:26,860 --> 00:22:29,180 And I am speaking specifically to white people right now. 335 00:22:29,180 --> 00:22:32,690 It is your job to regulate your nervous system when you're uncomfortable. 336 00:22:32,690 --> 00:22:34,990 It's no one else's job to do is for you. 337 00:22:34,990 --> 00:22:37,861 And that it is through this process of regulating, 338 00:22:37,861 --> 00:22:41,416 which we're gonna talk more about within the scope of an hour. 339 00:22:41,416 --> 00:22:45,150 There's so much more here that is hours worth of information. 340 00:22:45,150 --> 00:22:50,352 But to talk about what must we do and what is the utility of this? 341 00:22:50,352 --> 00:22:54,690 So, maybe you've heard the term white fragility. 342 00:22:54,690 --> 00:22:57,108 This idea of distress tolerance. 343 00:22:57,108 --> 00:23:02,702 That we get so distressed, that white people turn into this fragile state of, 344 00:23:02,702 --> 00:23:06,108 I just can't handle it, it's too much for me. 345 00:23:06,108 --> 00:23:07,588 I'm overwhelmed. 346 00:23:07,588 --> 00:23:10,522 White tears, white women tears, 347 00:23:10,522 --> 00:23:15,377 a lot of these social tropes and things like Instagram and 348 00:23:15,377 --> 00:23:20,856 Twitter have begun to normalize as aspects of white supremacy. 349 00:23:20,856 --> 00:23:23,721 Iterations of it, is this idea of white fragility and 350 00:23:23,721 --> 00:23:27,108 what we can also call that, is the lack of distress tolerance. 351 00:23:27,108 --> 00:23:29,008 My teacher, Reverend Angel, 352 00:23:29,008 --> 00:23:32,521 she talks about how white people are not fragile, okay? 353 00:23:32,521 --> 00:23:34,430 Straight up, we're not fragile. 354 00:23:34,430 --> 00:23:39,950 We came over the Rocky mountains in covered wagons with the wooden wheels. 355 00:23:39,950 --> 00:23:43,260 We brought our cattle in our buried plants. 356 00:23:43,260 --> 00:23:44,930 We hiked over the Rockies. 357 00:23:44,930 --> 00:23:48,330 We settled the planes as settlers, we're not fragile, okay? 358 00:23:48,330 --> 00:23:50,100 We can be tough people. 359 00:23:50,100 --> 00:23:53,600 But it's around this issue that we turn to glass. 360 00:23:54,930 --> 00:23:56,760 Why, why is that? 361 00:23:56,760 --> 00:23:58,278 It's a learned response. 362 00:23:58,278 --> 00:24:01,626 So, it's a learned response, that means that we can unlearn it and 363 00:24:01,626 --> 00:24:02,640 find new ways to go. 364 00:24:04,190 --> 00:24:06,124 Let's talk about the ratio of difference. 365 00:24:06,124 --> 00:24:09,340 And this is another threat response that the nervous system sees. 366 00:24:09,340 --> 00:24:13,633 When someone either has a culture that's different, attitudes that are different, 367 00:24:13,633 --> 00:24:17,410 ways of communicating that are different, skin tones that are different. 368 00:24:17,410 --> 00:24:21,765 It's easy for the nervous system, based on our wash in white supremacy culture, 369 00:24:21,765 --> 00:24:24,200 to perceive that that's a threat. 370 00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:27,480 And we need to recognize that that's happening. 371 00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:30,664 Again, it's so easy to say like, I'm a good white person. 372 00:24:30,664 --> 00:24:31,608 I've done enough work. 373 00:24:31,608 --> 00:24:32,734 That doesn't happen for me. 374 00:24:32,734 --> 00:24:37,414 Look, on a nervous system level, on a cellular level, on a hormonal level, 375 00:24:37,414 --> 00:24:41,303 we have been baked in this society that normalizes it every day. 376 00:24:41,303 --> 00:24:45,558 Encountering that and recognizing it and working with it, 377 00:24:45,558 --> 00:24:48,122 that is a huge part of this process. 378 00:24:48,122 --> 00:24:51,745 One of the things that was mentioned on the flyer for this event, 379 00:24:51,745 --> 00:24:53,971 is talking about racism as invisible. 380 00:24:53,971 --> 00:24:58,597 And this seems really essential to dive into because it really dovetails exactly 381 00:24:58,597 --> 00:25:00,785 with what we're talking about here. 382 00:25:00,785 --> 00:25:03,048 Racism at work is not invisible, man. 383 00:25:03,048 --> 00:25:05,920 White people are just numb, we are numb. 384 00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:08,926 And I think it's important to use that word deliberately. 385 00:25:08,926 --> 00:25:15,001 It's not that we are distant or somehow non-perceptive, 386 00:25:15,001 --> 00:25:18,896 it's that we have literally numbed. 387 00:25:18,896 --> 00:25:23,035 That some part of us has taken, either been overwhelmed or 388 00:25:23,035 --> 00:25:26,924 just dissociated, socially cultivated on purpose. 389 00:25:26,924 --> 00:25:31,917 We are on purpose, made to be numb this experience. 390 00:25:31,917 --> 00:25:35,814 Any racism in institutional settings is built through solidarity. 391 00:25:35,814 --> 00:25:38,170 The question becomes what do we do? 392 00:25:38,170 --> 00:25:39,550 What do we do? 393 00:25:39,550 --> 00:25:41,615 Do you feel like I do and feel the grief of that statement, 394 00:25:41,615 --> 00:25:43,260 that we are collectively numbed out to this? 395 00:25:44,830 --> 00:25:46,510 Where do we go from here? 396 00:25:46,510 --> 00:25:51,364 So because in the workplace anti-racism, again, in this institutional settings, 397 00:25:51,364 --> 00:25:55,948 we could have the policies all day, but whether or not the relationships are there 398 00:25:55,948 --> 00:26:00,422 to actually act on them and to build solidarity together, that's essential. 399 00:26:00,422 --> 00:26:04,533 So again, real solidarity is built through what Buddhists would call right actions. 400 00:26:04,533 --> 00:26:08,055 Something that is deliberate, intentional, with forethought and 401 00:26:08,055 --> 00:26:11,315 perception with the benefit of all beings in mind. 402 00:26:11,315 --> 00:26:14,455 And that right action, of course, they're born out of accountable relationships. 403 00:26:14,455 --> 00:26:17,355 That's how we learn and grow together. 404 00:26:19,750 --> 00:26:22,360 Real relationships require our feeling states. 405 00:26:24,380 --> 00:26:27,865 Require us to be in contact with all of these activation cycles, 406 00:26:27,865 --> 00:26:31,413 with the programming and the learning that is playing out day in, 407 00:26:31,413 --> 00:26:36,740 with people that you're in relationship every day with, with your colleagues. 408 00:26:36,740 --> 00:26:41,860 Again, we're not here to comprehend the experiences of others. 409 00:26:41,860 --> 00:26:45,900 This is not a primer on how to know what your black colleague is feeling. 410 00:26:45,900 --> 00:26:49,240 But this is about how we, for the white folks in the room, 411 00:26:49,240 --> 00:26:53,420 get in contact with the body information that's there already. 412 00:26:53,420 --> 00:26:55,040 It's there. 413 00:26:55,040 --> 00:26:56,480 We have to get in touch with it. 414 00:26:56,480 --> 00:27:00,620 And that can be a challenging aspect of, there are so 415 00:27:00,620 --> 00:27:05,043 many ways to cultivate anti-racism and so many means, 416 00:27:05,043 --> 00:27:11,464 that in a technological age, there is so many opportunities to be dehumanized. 417 00:27:11,464 --> 00:27:16,035 Being with the humanist of yourself, before we go into your colleagues 418 00:27:16,035 --> 00:27:20,159 experience, before we go into making plans about disrupting. 419 00:27:20,159 --> 00:27:24,522 It's essential from my perspective and from those who have taught me, 420 00:27:24,522 --> 00:27:29,177 that we are in touch with ourselves to know about these activation cycles and 421 00:27:29,177 --> 00:27:31,008 about what's going on here. 422 00:27:31,008 --> 00:27:32,900 And then that's how we become more human. 423 00:27:32,900 --> 00:27:38,080 I could go off about the risks of dehumanization in our society today. 424 00:27:38,080 --> 00:27:41,050 I think it's essential that we continue to be cultivating. 425 00:27:41,050 --> 00:27:42,745 What does it mean to be human? 426 00:27:42,745 --> 00:27:46,905 How do we become more human as we become more technologically advanced. 427 00:27:46,905 --> 00:27:51,516 It would be so easy for it to supersede and if you look at the rates of mental 428 00:27:51,516 --> 00:27:56,560 health and youth today, suicidality and and isolation, it's scary. 429 00:27:56,560 --> 00:27:57,910 It is scary. 430 00:27:57,910 --> 00:28:01,510 We really, especially as folks who are Treehouse and 431 00:28:01,510 --> 00:28:06,470 teaching folks entering into this field, we need, it's so important. 432 00:28:06,470 --> 00:28:10,324 We need to keep cultivating humanists together and learning how to do that and 433 00:28:10,324 --> 00:28:11,699 talking about this stuff. 434 00:28:16,634 --> 00:28:17,700 How's your body feeling? 435 00:28:21,510 --> 00:28:25,790 This is a moment for, I'd love to just hear in the chat here. 436 00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:28,790 Red Angel is awesome. 437 00:28:30,760 --> 00:28:32,420 Let me hear a couple of you. 438 00:28:32,420 --> 00:28:33,856 I know I'm not alone in here. 439 00:28:33,856 --> 00:28:39,081 What's your body feeling as we're talking about this? 440 00:28:46,038 --> 00:28:47,466 Be patient. 441 00:29:04,629 --> 00:29:09,326 Anybody noticing tension or temperature? 442 00:29:12,371 --> 00:29:17,389 >> [INAUDIBLE] >> Yeah, 443 00:29:17,389 --> 00:29:19,897 difficult conversations with relatives. 444 00:29:19,897 --> 00:29:21,442 Noticed that word stressed. 445 00:29:23,563 --> 00:29:26,404 Jaw clenching. 446 00:29:26,404 --> 00:29:33,999 [LAUGH] Yeah with COVID era abating and travel becoming possible. 447 00:29:33,999 --> 00:29:39,338 There maybe more encounters on, imagine quite a few of us have some summer plans. 448 00:29:46,546 --> 00:29:48,870 Let's be with these feelings for 449 00:29:48,870 --> 00:29:52,689 a moment because this is such important information. 450 00:29:52,689 --> 00:29:57,427 So often in anti-racist spaces and in our society, we're asked to react, right? 451 00:29:57,427 --> 00:30:02,425 See an Instagram post about another police murder of a black man, react, react, 452 00:30:02,425 --> 00:30:05,330 react, that to be with the feeling state here. 453 00:30:05,330 --> 00:30:07,311 There's so much information. 454 00:30:07,311 --> 00:30:09,373 Right here in these feelings. 455 00:30:19,349 --> 00:30:20,618 Right on. 456 00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:32,090 Yes, Slowing it down, right? 457 00:30:32,090 --> 00:30:34,570 Urgency is one of the tenants of white supremacy culture. 458 00:30:34,570 --> 00:30:37,446 We can't talk about this if we are barreling through, 459 00:30:37,446 --> 00:30:39,580 we have to be with these feeling states. 460 00:30:41,350 --> 00:30:46,389 Breaks my heart how so many of us, right, have been socialized in ways to just 461 00:30:46,389 --> 00:30:51,210 move right out of this, move into action, do, do, do, productivity. 462 00:30:53,860 --> 00:30:57,636 Let's take a couple more breaths just being here. 463 00:30:57,636 --> 00:30:59,486 It's really good to hear your resonance today. 464 00:31:12,232 --> 00:31:17,061 Okay, this is a really good moment for us to go again into a deeper practice. 465 00:31:17,061 --> 00:31:22,275 So I'm gonna again offer the invitation to notice the strength of your spine, 466 00:31:22,275 --> 00:31:24,803 coming up right, out of your sacrum, 467 00:31:24,803 --> 00:31:28,915 allowing the curve of your spine to sort of naturally come up. 468 00:31:28,915 --> 00:31:32,696 The shoulders are coming off, hanging loose and relaxed, 469 00:31:32,696 --> 00:31:34,441 which opens up your chest. 470 00:31:34,441 --> 00:31:37,559 Your arms can bend naturally at your elbows, and 471 00:31:37,559 --> 00:31:40,384 let your hands fall wherever they wanna be. 472 00:31:40,384 --> 00:31:43,875 You can have them palms down on your thighs or open, if you like. 473 00:31:43,875 --> 00:31:46,748 Tucking your chin slightly to elongate your cervical spine and 474 00:31:46,748 --> 00:31:48,433 allowing your eyes to gently close. 475 00:31:50,412 --> 00:31:52,283 This moment is your time. 476 00:31:55,339 --> 00:31:58,067 Coming into contact with your breathing. 477 00:32:08,910 --> 00:32:13,825 As your breath rises and falls, just simply paying attention to wherever you 478 00:32:13,825 --> 00:32:19,126 notice your breath most obviously, maybe it's in the rise and fall of your belly. 479 00:32:19,126 --> 00:32:23,690 But perhaps you feel it or on the base of your nostrils, 480 00:32:23,690 --> 00:32:26,279 riding in and out of your body. 481 00:32:26,279 --> 00:32:29,854 I invite folks to stay in touch with one point of contact in their body 482 00:32:29,854 --> 00:32:33,882 around their breathing, rather than trying to track the breath in and out. 483 00:32:33,882 --> 00:32:35,981 See how close you can get to the sensation. 484 00:32:49,935 --> 00:32:52,500 And again, those thoughts are rising as they're bound to do. 485 00:32:52,500 --> 00:32:55,386 We're not here to shove them out, we're not here to tamp them down. 486 00:32:55,386 --> 00:32:59,766 We're just here to allow, letting them past like clouds in the sky. 487 00:32:59,766 --> 00:33:03,971 The thoughts are here too, sensations in your bodies, 488 00:33:03,971 --> 00:33:09,440 they're here too, whatever feelings are arising, they are here too. 489 00:33:11,630 --> 00:33:13,961 Right now we're being with the breathing. 490 00:33:25,715 --> 00:33:27,536 Letting our minds and hearts and 491 00:33:27,536 --> 00:33:30,919 bodies absorb the themes that we're talking about today. 492 00:33:34,406 --> 00:33:36,864 Taking a moment to invite the rest and 493 00:33:36,864 --> 00:33:40,599 digest response to come into this part of our practice. 494 00:34:32,587 --> 00:34:36,415 If ever we get hooked by one of those thoughts, just gently, 495 00:34:36,415 --> 00:34:40,558 gently bringing ourselves back to that sensation of breathing. 496 00:34:53,610 --> 00:34:56,475 Noticing whatever is here and allowing, 497 00:35:02,029 --> 00:35:07,000 Allowing sensations in the body to talk to us, allowing maybe a tension or 498 00:35:07,000 --> 00:35:10,540 a space you might be encountering inside yourself. 499 00:35:12,760 --> 00:35:16,243 Allowing those thoughts to just pass right through. 500 00:35:18,330 --> 00:35:19,286 Here we are, 501 00:35:27,232 --> 00:35:31,357 For a few moments longer with nothing to do, 502 00:35:31,357 --> 00:35:35,602 nowhere to be, but right here, breathing. 503 00:36:14,292 --> 00:36:18,087 And as we linger here just a bit longer, 504 00:36:18,087 --> 00:36:23,156 I invite you to see if you can relax a little bit more, 505 00:36:29,149 --> 00:36:31,854 Land a little bit more deeply. 506 00:36:36,273 --> 00:36:37,923 Softening, 507 00:36:46,644 --> 00:36:51,085 Finding that ease in space, just a little bit more. 508 00:36:52,783 --> 00:36:58,650 Allowing yourself to unfold and release. 509 00:37:13,745 --> 00:37:19,505 Paying attention to that sensation of breathing, being right here with it. 510 00:37:41,600 --> 00:37:45,804 On your next big exhale, I invite you to seal your practice in whatever way feels 511 00:37:45,804 --> 00:37:50,809 meaningful to you, And come back to the room. 512 00:37:50,809 --> 00:37:54,634 Thank you so much, thank you so much for doing that with me. 513 00:37:58,194 --> 00:37:59,122 I got some content. 514 00:38:06,663 --> 00:38:08,811 My gosh, we're ahead of schedule. 515 00:38:08,811 --> 00:38:10,916 Okay, well, that's good. 516 00:38:10,916 --> 00:38:16,228 So we're gonna get to Q&A soon. 517 00:38:16,228 --> 00:38:23,073 If you have some questions, just allow that invitation to germinate. 518 00:38:27,509 --> 00:38:29,670 Okay, here's some closing thoughts. 519 00:38:30,810 --> 00:38:35,167 I really hope that you heard in this presentation today that confronting racism 520 00:38:35,167 --> 00:38:39,720 at work and the cultivation of antiracism in your workplace, it's not an issue for 521 00:38:39,720 --> 00:38:42,180 the folks of color in your office. 522 00:38:42,180 --> 00:38:47,093 It is not an issue for their ERG, it is not an issue for 523 00:38:47,093 --> 00:38:51,137 the one brown manager that you might have. 524 00:38:51,137 --> 00:38:57,318 Please hear, this is an issue for you, this is your issue. 525 00:38:57,318 --> 00:39:02,802 Living in a white supremacy culture has taken something precious from you, 526 00:39:02,802 --> 00:39:06,900 it's taken something precious from all of us. 527 00:39:06,900 --> 00:39:11,122 It's taught us how not to be fully human. 528 00:39:11,122 --> 00:39:13,523 There's a lot of pain in there, right? 529 00:39:15,579 --> 00:39:20,349 White supremacy culture has made such an impactful denial on 530 00:39:20,349 --> 00:39:25,307 our ability to be in connection and to learn about boundaries, 531 00:39:25,307 --> 00:39:29,250 and consent, and love in the meta sense, right? 532 00:39:30,920 --> 00:39:34,005 I'll leave it to one of my favorite authors, 533 00:39:34,005 --> 00:39:37,753 Nobel laureate Toni Morrison, who put it so rightly. 534 00:39:37,753 --> 00:39:41,786 If you can only be tall because someone else is on their knees, 535 00:39:41,786 --> 00:39:44,280 then you have a very serious problem. 536 00:39:45,610 --> 00:39:50,917 White people have a very, very serious problem. 537 00:39:50,917 --> 00:39:55,861 Let's hear it one more time, if you can only be tall because someone else 538 00:39:55,861 --> 00:39:59,440 is on their knees, you have a very serious problem. 539 00:40:00,620 --> 00:40:07,420 White people have a very, very serious problem, and it is ours to work with. 540 00:40:09,496 --> 00:40:14,080 I hope in this presentation you heard some hope today, because there is hope. 541 00:40:14,080 --> 00:40:19,483 There is hope that with nervous system regulation, with mindfulness practice, 542 00:40:19,483 --> 00:40:24,745 we can begin to reignite those feeling capacities and the sensations, right? 543 00:40:24,745 --> 00:40:28,787 To come back into contact with these pieces of ourselves 544 00:40:28,787 --> 00:40:33,689 that have been numbed out and are continuing to be grated on day in and 545 00:40:33,689 --> 00:40:36,540 day out by white supremacist society. 546 00:40:36,540 --> 00:40:41,517 There's a lot that we can say about the multitude of ways to cultivate antiracism. 547 00:40:41,517 --> 00:40:46,530 And this is one, this is one way that I have been taught to grow into 548 00:40:46,530 --> 00:40:51,452 my personal responsibility [COUGH] for how to be an antiracist and 549 00:40:51,452 --> 00:40:54,752 what my work is to grow into that identity. 550 00:40:54,752 --> 00:40:59,135 And to learn that it's not about arrival, not at all, it's about cultivation and 551 00:40:59,135 --> 00:41:00,470 practice. 552 00:41:00,470 --> 00:41:04,628 And that for me, the tools of mindfulness and of noticing these sensations 553 00:41:04,628 --> 00:41:08,590 that I like to avoid, that I've been numbed out to, it's essential. 554 00:41:10,050 --> 00:41:12,264 It's essential for staying in the long game and for 555 00:41:12,264 --> 00:41:14,230 learning more about what that really means. 556 00:41:16,700 --> 00:41:19,470 So this is the end of the content here. 557 00:41:19,470 --> 00:41:24,783 I'm gonna pop over to the Q&A tab and see what y'all have to say. 558 00:41:28,533 --> 00:41:29,979 Let's see what's going on here. 559 00:41:29,979 --> 00:41:31,620 Okay, session Q&A tab. 560 00:41:36,380 --> 00:41:41,646 Understand that you can upvote questions that seem interesting. 561 00:41:41,646 --> 00:41:42,937 Let's hear what you've got to say. 562 00:42:11,035 --> 00:42:15,751 Are there thoughts lingering, questions, experiences? 563 00:42:26,183 --> 00:42:31,291 We jammed through a lot of content here, and I invite you, 564 00:42:31,291 --> 00:42:36,086 as we linger a little bit longer here in this space, and 565 00:42:36,086 --> 00:42:39,858 my cat is doing her thing in the other room. 566 00:42:39,858 --> 00:42:45,409 I hope you can stay with the feelings that you came into contact with today and 567 00:42:45,409 --> 00:42:50,630 explore them on your own pace, in your own time, in your own practice. 568 00:42:53,340 --> 00:42:56,910 Folks are welcome to use that Q&A feature or the chat. 569 00:42:57,940 --> 00:43:00,360 But in the meantime, I will pop this on here. 570 00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:05,440 This is a invitation to get in touch with me on LinkedIn. 571 00:43:05,440 --> 00:43:06,334 It's my QR code. 572 00:43:06,334 --> 00:43:09,335 I'd love to hear from you. 573 00:43:09,335 --> 00:43:13,940 Great, a question, perfectionism and urgency feel like part of my personality. 574 00:43:13,940 --> 00:43:15,411 I'm not white and it's hard to hear and 575 00:43:15,411 --> 00:43:17,450 process that those are aspects of white supremacy. 576 00:43:17,450 --> 00:43:20,510 Any suggestions for resources? 577 00:43:20,510 --> 00:43:23,480 Ooh, okay, got a couple coming-ins, great. 578 00:43:25,950 --> 00:43:32,106 Carla, thank you so much for your question and for the invitation. 579 00:43:32,106 --> 00:43:33,003 Let's see. 580 00:43:35,062 --> 00:43:39,295 Well, one of the resources that I encourage everyone I can to 581 00:43:39,295 --> 00:43:44,026 get in touch with, Reverend Angel Kyodo Williams wrote this book, 582 00:43:44,026 --> 00:43:49,338 she coauthored with two other black, queer, Buddhist, academic folks. 583 00:43:49,338 --> 00:43:52,260 It's called Radical Dharma: Race, Love, and Liberation. 584 00:43:52,260 --> 00:43:57,275 And basically everything I know about this approach to antiracism has 585 00:43:57,275 --> 00:44:02,290 come through their work, contextualizing the role of connection and 586 00:44:02,290 --> 00:44:07,486 of meditation and regulation in building those resources long-term. 587 00:44:07,486 --> 00:44:11,144 Viewer asks about perfectionism and urgency. 588 00:44:11,144 --> 00:44:14,714 So I would say, as someone who is white, 589 00:44:14,714 --> 00:44:19,859 I'm not gonna pretend to offer you suggestion about how to 590 00:44:19,859 --> 00:44:25,634 navigate the complexities of being perceived white-passing or 591 00:44:25,634 --> 00:44:30,683 some of the experiences that I simply can't comment on. 592 00:44:30,683 --> 00:44:34,240 If you aren't familiar with their work, I really encourage everyone, 593 00:44:34,240 --> 00:44:35,533 everyone to check it out. 594 00:44:35,533 --> 00:44:41,297 They can hold space for complexity in a way that I admire deeply. 595 00:44:41,297 --> 00:44:45,654 But in terms of perfectionism and urgency, Tema Okun and 596 00:44:45,654 --> 00:44:50,468 dismantlingracism.org, they spent a long time cultivating 597 00:44:50,468 --> 00:44:54,666 the article that those tenants have circulated from. 598 00:44:54,666 --> 00:45:00,623 On a comment of your personality, without knowing more about your background and 599 00:45:00,623 --> 00:45:05,457 experience, specifically these tenants are, I wonder if like, 600 00:45:05,457 --> 00:45:09,167 when we talk about personalities or how we relate, 601 00:45:09,167 --> 00:45:13,423 I wonder to what degree that has to do with socialization. 602 00:45:13,423 --> 00:45:16,581 Were you socialized to perform perfectionism? 603 00:45:16,581 --> 00:45:21,013 Were you socialized that urgency is a necessary part? 604 00:45:21,013 --> 00:45:22,310 For me, attitudes and 605 00:45:22,310 --> 00:45:27,163 behaviors are not necessarily about what Buddhists would call the essential self. 606 00:45:27,163 --> 00:45:28,315 Those are learned traits. 607 00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:33,030 And I wonder how much they're serving you in your daily life. 608 00:45:33,030 --> 00:45:34,335 Of course they have utility. 609 00:45:34,335 --> 00:45:36,682 Of course in spaces like this, they make sense to be, 610 00:45:36,682 --> 00:45:38,725 those are things that are exploited, right? 611 00:45:38,725 --> 00:45:40,839 We wanna do a good job, we wanna please our boss, 612 00:45:40,839 --> 00:45:43,275 we wanna get things that are on time, we wanna achieve. 613 00:45:43,275 --> 00:45:45,450 We wanna be safe, right? 614 00:45:45,450 --> 00:45:46,870 We wanna be provided for in capitalism. 615 00:45:46,870 --> 00:45:50,310 We wanna climb the ladder as those things require us to do. 616 00:45:51,360 --> 00:45:55,282 So my inquiry or my question back to you is like, 617 00:45:55,282 --> 00:46:00,593 to what degree were you taught that those are part of who you are? 618 00:46:00,593 --> 00:46:05,097 And to what degree are those things that you learned how to use to survive 619 00:46:05,097 --> 00:46:09,075 this super dehumanizing space that we live in, our society and 620 00:46:09,075 --> 00:46:12,548 capitalism staggering, the haves and the have nots? 621 00:46:12,548 --> 00:46:17,468 And that those tenants of white supremacy culture are how we are taught to 622 00:46:17,468 --> 00:46:19,089 navigate and survive. 623 00:46:19,089 --> 00:46:21,806 Thank you so much for your question. 624 00:46:21,806 --> 00:46:24,992 Got another question here, how can I tell if my mindfulness practice is working? 625 00:46:24,992 --> 00:46:27,300 That's a fun one. 626 00:46:27,300 --> 00:46:30,989 My answer to that is that it's working, 627 00:46:30,989 --> 00:46:37,615 [LAUGH] it's working because there is no arrival, there is no end point. 628 00:46:37,615 --> 00:46:42,271 A lot of the stereotypical tropes about, 629 00:46:42,271 --> 00:46:46,527 again, the clear mind, empty mind, 630 00:46:46,527 --> 00:46:51,461 enlightened dude, I think it's kinda BS. 631 00:46:51,461 --> 00:46:56,315 For those of us in North America, in settler colonialism, in white supremacy 632 00:46:56,315 --> 00:47:01,537 cultures, in late stage capitalism, in the Anthropocene, right, where species 633 00:47:01,537 --> 00:47:06,257 die off all the time, mindfulness practice is working if you're doing it. 634 00:47:06,257 --> 00:47:08,903 Because it's meeting you where you are, right? 635 00:47:08,903 --> 00:47:12,371 It's not about being in some endpoint, 636 00:47:12,371 --> 00:47:17,267 it's not about achieving or demonstrating or proving. 637 00:47:17,267 --> 00:47:22,397 One of the things that might be helpful to ask about just with yourself 638 00:47:22,397 --> 00:47:27,180 is not how dedicated are you, but do you have some consistency? 639 00:47:27,180 --> 00:47:30,210 Do you have people that you're checking in with? 640 00:47:30,210 --> 00:47:34,313 In Buddhism, we talk about the three jewels, Buddha, dharma, and the sangha, 641 00:47:34,313 --> 00:47:38,875 and that loosely translates to the teacher, the group, and the truth. 642 00:47:38,875 --> 00:47:43,667 We need a teacher to guide us and to show us the way, we need the truth or 643 00:47:43,667 --> 00:47:47,634 the dharma, the teachings of the path to go forward, and 644 00:47:47,634 --> 00:47:50,462 we need each other, we need each other. 645 00:47:51,782 --> 00:47:56,680 So if you are in communication or if you're in relationship with sangha or 646 00:47:56,680 --> 00:48:02,378 a practice group, if you're looking for that, there are lots of resources around. 647 00:48:02,378 --> 00:48:06,735 But I would encourage you to explore what those different pieces of the process or 648 00:48:06,735 --> 00:48:11,042 the puzzle mean to you, and if maybe you need more support in one of those areas. 649 00:48:12,520 --> 00:48:16,466 Got one more question here, can I recommend a mantra or affirmation for 650 00:48:16,466 --> 00:48:18,330 meditating on antiracism? 651 00:48:18,330 --> 00:48:23,180 My God, that's such a great question, thank you. 652 00:48:23,180 --> 00:48:24,167 Let's see. 653 00:48:31,722 --> 00:48:36,396 The words that are coming up as I check in with my body in response to your 654 00:48:36,396 --> 00:48:39,661 question are, this is my work, this is my work. 655 00:48:39,661 --> 00:48:44,114 This is what's here with me, this is what I bring to the table, 656 00:48:44,114 --> 00:48:45,720 these are the pieces. 657 00:48:45,720 --> 00:48:46,786 Lama Rod Owens, 658 00:48:46,786 --> 00:48:51,583 who's one of the coauthors of that Radical Dharma book I mentioned, he has 659 00:48:51,583 --> 00:48:56,932 an amazing piece of advice that has really influenced why I'm here with you today. 660 00:48:56,932 --> 00:49:00,211 And he says, find the work that is yours, 661 00:49:00,211 --> 00:49:04,628 find the work that is yours, and commit to it 100%. 662 00:49:04,628 --> 00:49:07,348 I don't know about y'all, but I definitely, 663 00:49:07,348 --> 00:49:10,136 in the socializations around white supremacy, 664 00:49:10,136 --> 00:49:13,742 I have had this idea at points in my life where I need to do it all. 665 00:49:13,742 --> 00:49:17,926 And I can despair when I perceive that there is so much to do and 666 00:49:17,926 --> 00:49:21,300 that individuals are incapable of doing it all. 667 00:49:22,750 --> 00:49:27,020 With that said, we don't have to do it all. 668 00:49:27,020 --> 00:49:29,540 That's white supremacy culture to think that we have to do it all. 669 00:49:29,540 --> 00:49:34,517 What we have to do is find the work that is ours, find the work that is yours, 670 00:49:34,517 --> 00:49:36,347 and commit to it 100%. 671 00:49:36,347 --> 00:49:40,971 So in my experience, the ways that I have come into this moment with you, and 672 00:49:40,971 --> 00:49:45,308 the ways that I embody antiracism in my life and that I work towards it and 673 00:49:45,308 --> 00:49:50,185 that I learn from continuously, is through recognizing the work that is mine. 674 00:49:50,185 --> 00:49:51,712 This is my work. 675 00:49:51,712 --> 00:49:56,486 What does your body show you that is your work in this world, 676 00:49:56,486 --> 00:49:59,933 in the sphere of cultivating antiracism? 677 00:49:59,933 --> 00:50:03,331 What do you have to contact and approach? 678 00:50:03,331 --> 00:50:06,768 And We haven't even talked about the word messy but 679 00:50:06,768 --> 00:50:09,470 like, my goodness, this work is incredibly messy. 680 00:50:09,470 --> 00:50:10,620 It's incredibly human. 681 00:50:10,620 --> 00:50:13,400 It's incredibly fleshy and visceral. 682 00:50:13,400 --> 00:50:15,060 It is confusing. 683 00:50:16,590 --> 00:50:17,610 There's so much there. 684 00:50:18,680 --> 00:50:24,600 And what's arising for you right now, that's yours. 685 00:50:26,110 --> 00:50:30,299 Whatever that is, wherever that's gonna lead right now, this work is mine, 686 00:50:30,299 --> 00:50:31,190 this is my work. 687 00:50:33,910 --> 00:50:36,770 Even if it's just right here starting with yourself, this is my work. 688 00:50:37,960 --> 00:50:41,410 And I encourage you not to end there, to stay there. 689 00:50:41,410 --> 00:50:43,890 But this is the entry point, right? 690 00:50:43,890 --> 00:50:47,505 If we're ever gonna come into relationship with PRC, 691 00:50:47,505 --> 00:50:52,230 BIPOC-led Organizations or movements, it's essential. 692 00:50:52,230 --> 00:50:55,445 It's essential that you have connection with yourself and 693 00:50:55,445 --> 00:50:58,090 your feeling states to be able to even perceive. 694 00:50:59,320 --> 00:51:00,472 Am I welcome in this space? 695 00:51:00,472 --> 00:51:04,770 Am I perpetuating colonization of white supremacy by being here? 696 00:51:04,770 --> 00:51:07,540 What does consent and relationship mean and look like? 697 00:51:07,540 --> 00:51:11,940 It requires us to be involved in connection with ourselves. 698 00:51:11,940 --> 00:51:14,010 So, hopefully that was helpful. 699 00:51:17,030 --> 00:51:18,530 There's some chat going down. 700 00:51:20,760 --> 00:51:23,174 NAP ministry bumped for that. 701 00:51:24,950 --> 00:51:28,773 Yes, it's grind culture. 702 00:51:34,142 --> 00:51:35,300 Why am I talking? 703 00:51:35,300 --> 00:51:35,800 That's a good one. 704 00:51:39,874 --> 00:51:43,239 You guys are really dropping some beautiful stuff here in the chat, 705 00:51:43,239 --> 00:51:52,670 thank you Beautiful. 706 00:51:52,670 --> 00:51:55,710 We've got a few more minutes before we close up formally. 707 00:51:57,460 --> 00:52:03,770 Anyone else feel like, Having their voice heard? 708 00:52:03,770 --> 00:52:05,187 Asking question? 709 00:52:16,220 --> 00:52:20,776 I'm really so grateful that you were here, truly. 710 00:52:20,776 --> 00:52:24,308 And it's a great privilege to be able to share this space with you today. 711 00:52:29,726 --> 00:52:34,189 I know you're out there through this [LAUGH] funny little camera 712 00:52:34,189 --> 00:52:35,458 I'm looking at. 713 00:52:35,458 --> 00:52:36,248 Thank you. 714 00:52:57,533 --> 00:52:58,334 You want some breath? 715 00:52:58,334 --> 00:53:02,280 Yes, let's do it pretty quickly. 716 00:53:02,280 --> 00:53:03,383 Here we go. 717 00:53:07,900 --> 00:53:11,935 Yeah, taking those deep breaths with you through the rest of the festival for 718 00:53:11,935 --> 00:53:14,085 the rest of your tech learning journey. 719 00:53:14,085 --> 00:53:19,184 I think I got this GIF from Giphy [LAUGH] 720 00:53:19,184 --> 00:53:24,448 There are lots of materials online for 721 00:53:24,448 --> 00:53:27,256 sources like this. 722 00:53:32,568 --> 00:53:35,500 And I would love for any of you to stay in touch. 723 00:53:35,500 --> 00:53:38,040 I mentioned I'm accessible on LinkedIn, you can go my website. 724 00:53:39,400 --> 00:53:43,163 We'd love to hear how your journey is going. 725 00:53:43,163 --> 00:53:44,300 Feel free to drop me a link.